Parenting Goals for 2006: Two Words of Advice

By Chick Moorman and Thomas Haller
www.chickmoorman.com

Want to get your parenting efforts off to a great start this year? Are you serious about including some mothering or fathering resolutions in your 2006 goals? Do you plan to make family a top priority during the next 12 months? If so, why not consider these two words of advice: Passion and Grace.

This year I resolve to increase passion for my family by firmly holding in my consciousness my desire to succeed at home first.

I resolve to demonstrate grace in my family by taking the stance that mistakes are permitted here. I intend to see errors, not as errors, but as opportunities for growth and as data that can be used for learning.

I resolve to increase passion in my family by demonstrating my belief that the single best thing I can do for my children is to love their mother (father).

I resolve to increase grace in my family by focusing on fixing problems rather than fixing blame. To that end I will be solution-oriented without attacking character or personality in the process.

I resolve to show passion for my family by strengthening feelings of connectedness through the creation of family rituals, preservation of the family history with photo albums and scrapbooks, and the repeated telling of stories that reveal our family traditions and uniqueness.

I resolve to bring grace to my parenting role by seeing my children as unfinished. I know that God has not completed His job with any of us, myself included. I will keep that in mind as my children move down their own path towards becoming who they were intended to be.

I resolve to increase passion for my family by increasing my presence. I will increase both the amount of time I am physically present for my family and the level of emotional presence I bring to those times when I am there.

I resolve to show grace in my family by not making my children wrong for their actions, even as I hold them accountable for their actions. I see implementing consequences as one of the most loving things I can do as a parent and I perform that role with an open heart.

I resolve to show passion for my family by demonstrating the physical affection of hugging, kissing, holding, nurturing, smiling, and using caring, sustained eye contact with all family members.

I resolve to demonstrate grace in my family by seeing it all as perfect. If my children are choosing appropriate behaviors, that is perfect. If they are choosing inappropriate behaviors, that too, is perfect. It is the perfect time for me to allow them to experience consequences and teach some new behaviors. If these resolutions are working for you, that is perfect. If they are not working, it is the perfect data needed for you to create the necessary adjustments.

Put Passion and Grace into your family during this coming year. Use them to make 2006 your best parenting year ever.

Happy New Year.

Chick Moorman and Thomas Haller are the authors of The 10 Commitments: Parenting with Purpose. They are two of the world's foremost authorities on raising responsible, caring, confident children. They publish a free monthly e-zine for parents. To sign up for it or obtain more information about how they can help you or your group meet your parenting needs, visit www.chickmoorman.com for more information.